Third summer without television provides even more benefits.

For the third summer in my lifetime, I cancelled my cable television subscription.
I did it back in 1999 after the final episode of “Seinfeld” aired, as a semi-protest to the lack of good material available to watch. The protest kind of worked because a whole slew of decent shows like “The Sopranos” began airing that fall.
My wife and I also cancelled our cable in the summer of 2007, mainly because we were hoping to move from Wautoma to Portage County and thought we could make the move easier by getting rid of one of the objects we’d have to take care of anyhow. As luck had it, we didn’t sell our house until the spring of 2008 and our desire to watch many of our favorite shows caused us to reorder cable that September.
We cancelled it this summer for one main reason: to save some money. It’s only about $40 a month, as we still pay for our Internet service through the cable company. But $40 times three months is $120, and in today’s economy cutting $120 in three months time seems significant, especially since we’re using it to pay down some of our other debt.
Thrifty moves like this have allowed us to pay off three credit cards this year, leaving us with just two more to pay off. We didn’t have a significant amount of debt on any of these cards, but enough that we still had a $20 minimum monthly payment on each of them. By eliminating them, we’re able to save more money and increase the amount of available funds in our bank accounts every month.
According to my wife, this strategy of paying down debt to increase savings and available funds is Oprah’s “Debt Diet.”
I don’t know anything else about this “Debt Diet” – I’m just hoping it’s more successful than some of Oprah’s other diets. It seems to be working, as my wife and I have noticed a tremendous difference in our finances despite not receiving any pay increases during this time.
We’re even moving forward with house plans. Originally, we were looking to buy a house in Stevens Point or Plover based on criteria that included good location, a nice walk-in closet for the master bedroom, little to no fixing up as neither of us are handy, and a decent kitchen.
Over the past two years we’ve looked at a lot of houses, and none of them truly matched what we wanted. Building a house wasn’t really an option we considered because it seemed too expensive for us.
With Oprah’s “Debt Diet,” though, not only was that option put on the table, but it’s one we have nearly achieved, as we will close on a lot in the Eagle Point Subdivision in Stevens Point by the end of the month.
We’re not going to build a house on the lot until we pay it off hopefully within the next year, but my wife and I are thrilled we even made it this far, as we never imagined we’d be able to build our own house while we were in our 30s. We both assumed it wasn’t something we’d do until our 50s and our kid(s) was off to college.
We’re still discussing plans with a builder for when we actually begin construction, but we’re learning by our thrifty cable-cancelling ways and making sure the house we end up building is something that is affordable, yet to our liking.
This might mean learning a few things from my handy father-in-law, such as installing flooring in a few rooms, to save a few thousand dollars here and there. I’m fairly sure of myself that I won’t install the flooring upside down with a qualified instructor like him showing me what to do.
It might also mean permanently cancelling our cable subscription and instead relying on antenna television. I haven’t had that type of television since junior high, but in this age of the Internet and a seemingly endless supply of entertainment options, not having more than 100 channels isn’t a big deal.
In fact, it’s actually a relief. We are more active, I’ve read a bunch of the books that have gathered dust by our bed, and we’ve managed to avoid all the hoopla about Jon and Kate and their eight children.
My only regret is missing some of the Michael Jackson coverage. But listening to others complain about it gives me pause to think that I don’t regret that at all.

Celeb reality takes over airwaves

In case you haven’t noticed, reality shows have taken over our television; “Big Brother,” “Survivor,” “Trading Spouses,” “Supernanny,” “My Big Redneck Wedding” and “Extreme Makeover: Home Edition” are just a few of these shows and they all feature real people, like you and me.
“Survivor” was one of the first of these shows and it caught people’s attention because it was so different from regular TV programs. Nine years and hundreds of reality shows later, this genre is as popular as regular TV, although many people despise it. I’d like to think I’m one of these people, but in truth I watch my fair share of reality.
Especially now, since a new genre of reality shows, one featuring celebrities, has shattered normal people’s hopes of ever becoming famous through reality television. Shows like “Celebrity Apprentice,” “Celebrity Rehab with Dr. Drew,” “Gone Country,” “Dancing with the Stars,” “Rock of Love 2 with Brett Michaels,” “Flavor of Love 3,” and “Celebrity Fit Club” have all taken away airtime for you and me to become famous.
Celeb reality, as it is called, is nothing like reality, just like regular reality television is nothing like reality. Instead of watching a bunch of Joe Schmos act like fools for their 15 minutes of fame, with celeb reality we get to watch a bunch of has-beens and B-list celebrities act like fools to get some of their last few minutes of fame.
I’ll start with Bret Michaels. Back in the day, from 1986 to 1991, his band Poison was often near the top of the charts and he had girls, parties and money every which way he turned. Then Nirvana happened and he and all his hair-metal buddies never had a hit record again. Poison is now on the nostalgia circuit, playing at venues a fraction of the size they used to play.
Michaels’ hair fell out, like it should since he is in his forties, but he did not want to age gracefully. He put on a bandana, then hair extensions, and found VH1, which gave him not only one but two dating shows. Much like “The Bachelor,” this show has Michaels living with a bunch of girls looking for their true love in a nice mansion and every week he gives the girls some tasks that help him decide which girls to keep and which ones to eliminate.
These tasks include making them wrestle pigs, play mud football and piecing together a motorcycle – you know the everyday things people have a potential love interest do to see if he or she is the right person. Personally, I had my wife change the oil in my car and then had her bungee jump with her eyes blindfolded before I proposed to her. When she did these things, I knew she was the one for me. Love and compatibility had nothing to do with it.
Another celeb reality show featuring people way past their prime is “Gone Country” on CMT. Celebrities on this show include heavy-metalist Dee Snider of Twisted Sister, Carnie Wilson of Wilson Phillips, Marcia Brady of the Brady Bunch (she has a real name but who really cares what it is), one-hit wonder Sisqo (remember “Thong Song”), Julio Iglesis Jr. (this guy is more D-list than B-list since the only thing he’s done to earn any fame is have a famous father), some “American Idol” failure and former R&B superstar-turned-crackhead Bobby Brown.
This show gives these celebrities a country makeover, with the winner earning a Nashville recording contract. However, very little time is spent doing this and most of the camera time goes to Brown who gets drunk often, pees all over his room and Snider while sleepwalking, and exposes himself while sleeping to Wilson and Brady.
The rest of the time is devoted to Brady, who is basically crazy. She gets excited easily, cries often, fails to perform because of stage fright and fawns all over Brown.
To sum up this show, it’s brilliant. The reason people watch reality television is to see crazy people grabbing at air for fame and this show has way more of that than any other.
Another brilliant show is “Celebrity Rehab with Dr. Drew.” Dr. Drew, known to most people as a sex expert, is also a rehab specialist. He brings in celebrities with substance-abuse problems, like actors Daniel Baldwin and Jeff Conaway, porn star Mary Carey, former professional wrestler Chyna, former child actress Jaimee Foxworth, actress Brigitte Nielsen, another “American Idol” failure and several others.
Unlike the other celeb reality shows, most of these former stars are serious about being on the show. Conaway, best known for his roles in “Grease” and “Taxi,” is in the worst shape, going through heavy withdrawal and seeming much older than he actually is because of the heavy toll drugs took on his body.
I said most because Baldwin was the only one on the show without a current problem and the first to leave, because the married-man-with-child-on-the-way tried to start something up with the porn star. In a show that actually gives people a real glimpse at something – the dangers of addiction and the hardship people have in overcoming them – the one person that acts like other celebrities on other shows comes off looking like the biggest fool.
I’m waiting for a television genius to combine all of these celeb reality shows using the biggest fools like Baldwin, Michaels, Brown and Brady. It could be called “Rock of Country Rehab.” The celebrities would each try to find their love interest while getting a country makeover and undergoing rehab. The rehab portion wouldn’t be for addiction issues, although Brown could probably use it. It would be for their addiction to fame.
Now that’s a show everyone would watch.

'Summer of No Television' leads to creative imagination

Forty years after the “Summer of Love,” which occurred in 1967 seven years before I was born, comes my family’s self-imposed “Summer of No Television.”
Anticipating a move from Wautoma to Stevens Point as soon as our house sells, hopefully sometime this decade, we canceled our cable subscription.
It was not a spur-of-the-moment decision. My wife and I debated and argued about it, until we finally compromised to do so after the last of our shows finished its regular season.
Fittingly, this last show was the final episode of HBO’s “The Sopranos,” a show we’ve both been watching since before we started dating. Initially, we were both disappointed by the ending to this great show, mainly because it didn’t offer a definitive conclusion, but since then we’ve come to realize the many different interpretations of the final fade-to-black scene make it perfect. It leaves the viewer to his or her imagination to guess what happened.
I’ve rediscovered this imagination since pulling the plug on our cable. Books I purchased years ago but never got around to reading, like “Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince,” are suddenly getting dusted off after being removed from our bookshelf for the purpose they were intended – to be read.
I’m a book-reading machine now, something I haven’t been since junior high when I lived in a rural area with only three network channels and two UHF channels. Back then, I would read some books three times before returning them to the library. When we moved to a city with cable, my book-reading volume instantly declined. Who wants Stephen King when you can have your MTV?
This is not the first time I’ve canceled my cable. I did so when I was single in 1998. After “Seinfeld” ended, I voiced my opposition to the lack of good television by getting rid of it. I know my protest was effective because, just a few short months later in January 1999, HBO introduced “The Sopranos.”
I’m still waiting for at least one thank you from any one of the millions of “The Sopranos” fans for my action that resulted in this show, as well as the other good shows like “Lost,” “Heroes” and “The Office” that have followed since my protest. I won’t hold my breath waiting for a thank you, though.
This year’s “Summer of No Television” will end when we move, or when the fall season returns in late August. No matter how bad “Prison Break” got this last season, I still need to know find out what will happen to Lincoln and Michael this coming season.
And don’t get me started on “Lost.” Last season’s finale was television at its best. I’m just mad that I have to wait until January for season three to begin. Flash forward. Wow. Even in my wildest imagination that I’m redeveloping I would never have dreamed of that.
This “Summer of No Television” isn’t entirely television-free. We still watch DVDs. My 2-year-old, Braden, gets a daily fix of a lot of strange but charmingly wonderful characters through some of his cartoon movies. Boog the Bear, Elliot the Deer, Sully the Monster, Lightning McQueen the Race Car, Nemo the Clown Fish, R.J. the Raccoon, Mumbo the Dancing Penguin, Simba the Lion and a multitude of others are familiar faces in our household.
Some of these faces may become a little too familiar after the 20th viewing, but I’m not going to protest because the producers did a great job of making them appealing to adults also. Just listen to the soundtracks. They’re loaded with music by the likes of Paul Westerberg (The Replacements – greatest band ever), Elton John, Ben Folds and other adult-friendly artists.
Braden hasn’t really noticed our cable is missing, mainly because he has access to these movies. Once in a while he tells me to turn on “Little Einsteins” or “Mickey Mouse Clubhouse,” but he’s usually content playing with his play-dough or cars. Maybe he’ll develop his imagination with his daddy this summer.
The “Summer of Love” and the “Summer of No Television” may appear to have absolutely nothing in common; the reality is there would be more love if people turned off their televisions and turned on their imaginations. Imagine this world where all you have is love.